Top 10 in 2007 5.Comitment issues
5 Commitment issues (and the fact I am 31!) 
Yes, I admit that. I have issues. The fact that I am 31 and still single bothers me a bit more than ever. (That’s right. I am honest with you.) Well, my big boss director Daniel Chae and his wife Helen had been monitoring my “progress” for a while. Before I left DOULOS, Helen once told me (very serious) “you need to find a nice girl and get married as soon as possible”. I kind of knew she had someone in mind for me. Well, it is not like nobody interested in Ray, frankly speaking. Or, on the other hand, as if I am not into any romance or potential partnership… Ok, I admit it is cool to be single and free. I enjoy most of the time when I don’t have to argue where to go for dinner, what movie to go, how to plan my schedule for next week, or when to pick up my laundry.
It is not like I had never been seeing anybody. Actually, before leaving DOULOS, I was one of the only few people who had applied SP (social permission) twice. However, you know, God has a different plan in my life. Meanwhile, as I walked through the final phase of DOULOS ministry, there were sisters who had shown their goodwill to me. I somehow sensed a mixed feeling. One side of me really enjoyed being cared, accompanied, and appreciated; on the other hand, I also felt sorry for them because at this stage of my life commitment was a vague hope. I was very honest with everybody and myself. I cannot afford the luxury to be in a relationship or whatever before the end of my time with DOULOS. It had been a hard year for me in 2007. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem promising in this year to come, since I am once again standing in front of the crossroad. On top of all these, what make things more complicated is many of my buddies either were married or getting married in the near future. 25~33 to many seems like a “must- married” zone. (Check the video from sweet talk from Maria and Byron!) Don't get me wrong. I am happy for all of them, indeed. However, for me it was like a tough decision to make. Yeah, I know. I have issues.
I will appreciate your prayers, but not too much pressure or judgments. Hopefully, towards the end of 2008, I can write you some positive progress in this area.
Yes, I admit that. I have issues. The fact that I am 31 and still single bothers me a bit more than ever. (That’s right. I am honest with you.) Well, my big boss director Daniel Chae and his wife Helen had been monitoring my “progress” for a while. Before I left DOULOS, Helen once told me (very serious) “you need to find a nice girl and get married as soon as possible”. I kind of knew she had someone in mind for me. Well, it is not like nobody interested in Ray, frankly speaking. Or, on the other hand, as if I am not into any romance or potential partnership… Ok, I admit it is cool to be single and free. I enjoy most of the time when I don’t have to argue where to go for dinner, what movie to go, how to plan my schedule for next week, or when to pick up my laundry. 
It is not like I had never been seeing anybody. Actually, before leaving DOULOS, I was one of the only few people who had applied SP (social permission) twice. However, you know, God has a different plan in my life. Meanwhile, as I walked through the final phase of DOULOS ministry, there were sisters who had shown their goodwill to me. I somehow sensed a mixed feeling. One side of me really enjoyed being cared, accompanied, and appreciated; on the other hand, I also felt sorry for them because at this stage of my life commitment was a vague hope. I was very honest with everybody and myself. I cannot afford the luxury to be in a relationship or whatever before the end of my time with DOULOS. It had been a hard year for me in 2007. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem promising in this year to come, since I am once again standing in front of the crossroad. On top of all these, what make things more complicated is many of my buddies either were married or getting married in the near future. 25~33 to many seems like a “must- married” zone. (Check the video from sweet talk from Maria and Byron!) Don't get me wrong. I am happy for all of them, indeed. However, for me it was like a tough decision to make. Yeah, I know. I have issues.
I will appreciate your prayers, but not too much pressure or judgments. Hopefully, towards the end of 2008, I can write you some positive progress in this area.
Comments